Journal Writing Experience.

Okay...I have been writing my journal now for a week. I took a leap and finally put pen to paper after the eye opening session with Alan and Sophie.

To begin with I didn't really think about the styles of journal writing suggested to us. I thought I would just let my pen flow...I recorded whatever happened in my day and where ever my thoughts took me. As I look back now over my first entries I see that I was actually using a style that was suggested to us. I naturally took the form of Description.

12th-14th March.
My first few entries were mostly made up of description. I explained my day and what had happened in a story like fashion. This is a good way to capture the events in an interesting light, but I think is a very inward way of looking at things. The way I see things and the emotions and personal opinions involved could actually scramble the facts and portray the events in a different way. As I read through now, I also notice another style being introduced without it being planned...Initial Reflection.

Through the use of my Initial Reflection I can sense my mood and feelings at the time of writing. I am apprehensive about starting a journal. I don't seem confident that I am understanding the process and it's benefits for me. Looking back now it is good to see how I have grown just in this past week.

14th-15th March.
At this point I can see my journal beginning to develop. I am getting to grips with the different styles of journal writing. I have a lot of ideas and thoughts flying about and I am practising various forms of writing to record them which include Reflection, What if?, Lists, Sketches and Graphs. 

15th-19th March.
At this period of time I am very busy and it shows in my writing. I am less descriptive and more to the point. I am writing in lists or just short sentences jotted down. Will this work? I may try this? Asking myself questions, coming up with ideas and plans and then later going back to write down if those plans were successful. I think that sections like this in my journal are the most beneficial for me as a teacher. Preparing for classes, teaching via the plan and then going back to evaluate what happened I think really helps me to see what went wrong and why and hopefully make me develop as a teacher, learning from what works and what doesn't and going about things differently the next time.

I have put in a few snippets from my journal as an example of the above and how it can really help you develop when you plan and evaluate the situation.

19th March.
Last rehearsal today for my Grade 1 ballet and contemporary before the Easter Event on Friday.

We will practise in the main hall where the actual performance will take place. I will set out markers on the floor to help them to know where they stand along with setting out the chairs for the "audience" so they can get a feel of what it will be like on the day of the performance.
We will also practise in full costume.

If the girls get the dance routines right then there is no need to keep rehearsing over and over again. We will do something fun to break up the class and they can see it as a reward for doing well. I am very enthusiastic that the routines rehearsal will go well today. If it does then it would be silly over rehearsing.

If there are mistakes in the routine...maybe I can film them performing the routine to see if this helps? That way they can see their mistakes and know where to improve.


What happened -
Both classes did brilliantly with the routines.
We rehearsed once without the music just to see if there was anything that needed going over. There wasn't, so this went well. Then we put on costumes which the kids were really excited about and made them more enthusiastic to rehearse. As this second rehearsal went well also I decided to do something fun at that point rather than at the end. I thought that this would break up the session and get them more enthusiastic so then making the last practise go well rather than being bored of repetitive rehearsal. We did fun stuff for 15 minutes.
In the last 5 minutes we did one more rehearsal, this time in our performing space with the floor markings and with me filming.
The rehearsal went really well. There was just one thing...not enough pointy feet!
They loved watching themselves on film and it had the exact effect I wanted. They found the video amusing because they could also see what I could see and had been going on at them about...floppy feet!


I was extremely happy after this rehearsal. I went away feeling like I had achieved exactly what I wanted and I knew that the class were happy as well.
I know that if I had not been contemplating and planning the class in my journal the class would not have gone so well. I would have been stressing and worrying about them getting it right...I would not have allowed time for fun stuff and would have over rehearsed which probably would have led to them getting it wrong rather than improving it. Even after writing my plans I did find myself looking at the clock thinking, shall we not do fun stuff, we haven't got time, shall we rehearse again? But I scolded myself as I was determined to stick to my plans. I'm really glad I did.


As a whole my journal so far has been about my dance school, the rehearsal process for our Easter Event and preparations and evaluations of my teaching for dance classes at other schools.
I am interested to see how the journal develops as time goes on and whatever is going on in my life changes.

I started my journal with Description as I found this the most natural method for me as I enjoy telling a story. Funnily enough I have found this form of writing the least beneficial for me in my practise.

The types of writing I feel have helped me and will build and develop me as a teacher are -

• List
• Evaluation
• What if?
• Initial Reflection

2nd Campus Session

I attended the session last week, so I am a little bit late at putting down my thoughts and ideas that were triggered on the day...this is a memory of the experience so forgive me if it is not completely correct, but I do hope to share as much as I can.

The statement about a memory of the experience is probably the first thing that I took from the day of the session and have been mulling over it for the past few days.

We watched a video of Daniel Kahneman talking about "happiness"...The Riddle of experience vs. memory. 

'The second trap is the confusion between an experience and memory. Basically it is being happy in your life and being happy with your life. These are two very different concepts...The third trap is the focusing illusion, and it's the unfortunate fact that we can't think of any circumstance that affects well being without distorting it's importance...'

This video triggered off a discussion of our opinions on experience vs. memory and times when we could relate to this.

Kahneman went on to say about a man who had been listening to a symphony which he found to be glorious..but as he listened he got to the end and he found it to be dreadful and he said that it ruined the whole experience for him. Kahleman explains....'it hadn't ruined the experience for him. But it had ruined the memory of the experience. He'd had the experience, he'd had 20 minutes of glorious music. They counted for nothing! Because he was left with the memory. The Memory was ruined. And that was all he had left.'

This last statement really got me thinking. How many times I have said just that...the whole experience was ruined! I don't know why it's never clicked with me before...it's really obvious when you stop to look and think about it. Of course, I still had the good pieces of the experience. The bad pieces do not suddenly delete the good.
I do think it can work in a different way also. Instead of deleting the good, we often can look back on experiences with tinted glasses. Everything appears rosy and perfect...because a part of our mind has thrown away the bad experiences and only remembers the good.

In February, my partner and I stayed at a castle for the night on my birthday. We had stayed before and it had been really lovely so we decided to revisit. It was still a really enjoyable visit but I remember saying...'It wasn't as good as the first time.' I have said this on many occasion when I have revisited a favourite place.
But thinking about it after listening and reflecting on Kahneman's talk...this isn't true. Obviously somethings may have been better the first time, certain things may have happened for it to stand out to me, but I see now...it is memory that changes the first experience. The memory of my experience is difficult competition for a real, present experience.
It would be interesting to see how I would feel if I could swap the experiences around. If I could wipe the memory of the first experience, go through the second experience as the first experience and then the first experience after. Would I think my original first experience the better one? I doubt it.

We still have an experience even without the memories (photos, mind memory), but it's the memories we construct that remain where as experiences disappear.


After the video, we discussed various topics Kahneman mentioned which led us on to the art of reflection.

A few ideas I got from the discussion:

Reflection should not be an emotional way of thinking, of how we felt at that time, but instead should be an account of facts, of reasons why and how we responded or should have responded.

Letting feelings and emotions make our judgement is not a fare and reasonable analysis, instead it becomes more of a personal view. We should be looking at it from an outward perspective as if we are not involved.
When writing the journal a good way to do this would be through the style of another view.


One last point that has stood out to me since starting this course and seeing how we learn - Do I just investigate, take on board and remember topics that interests me?

What captures my attention is usually something I can relate to or that interests me. This I can expand upon and learn from and then hopefully move onto things I wouldn't have necessarily been interested in learning before.

Is this the natural way of learning? Is this how most people learn? How can I go about making the things I am not so interested in stick? Are there things I am missing and not taking on board? As I am always going through the doors that are unlocked (things that interest me) and just ignoring the locked doors (things that don't interest me), hoping that there may be another way to get to them through the unlocked ones.


All these points have certainly helped me to get started on my journal. Reflecting over these ideas have made me very much aware of the true value they hold.

These points were something that I already did know as scrambled thoughts, but it took Kahleman's video and our discussion to actually become aware of them and build sense onto them.

I had the pieces but now they have clicked together to form the jigsaw.

Starting my journal...

I have heard somewhere that a journal is supposed to be the window to your soul.
I really like that expression and I will aim to remember it as I go along this task as I feel this will prevent me from editing or scrapping any thing I have written that I feel has no use.

I used to write journals when I was a child. Back then I would call it a diary, but after my research and readings on keeping a journal I think now they were more like journals than diaries.
I wrote down my daily activities for several years in different diaries. I actually came across these diaries just last week. I had a quick read through my entries and they were very amusing but also really lovely memories to look back on.
I consider myself a very creative person in many different ways. I love writing and am very passionate about story writing. I have been writing fictional stories for my own enjoyment since I was a young teenager and have been working on a number of long stories for the past couple of years.
Because of my creative streak I am looking forward to keeping a journal and I'm not scared of writing down my thoughts and ideas.

Something that has held me back from starting the journal right away was one word that I kept coming across as I was reading the material given to us about journal keeping. That word was learning.
I could easily write down my thoughts, plans, ideas, daily activities and work issues..I could even do it in a creative way that I would enjoy. I have really enjoyed blogging for this reason.

But I kept asking myself....would I actually be learning? 

If I documented thoughts and ideas down in a way I always have done would I actually be pushing and improving myself?

Maybe I am looking too deeply into it. Maybe the learning process is not something that jumps out at you but happens over time as my writing changes with thoughts and ideas progressing and transforming into other thoughts and ideas. If I looked back over my writing, analysing and reflecting my earlier entries, would this be the point at which I can understand my improvements and how far I have come from my first entry to the latest entry?

I aim to create my journal in different ways. Description will be my main tool to portray my daily accounts as I would a story. But I would also love to use imagery. I think sketching and drawing is a lovely way to put across thoughts. I often have ideas that I can't describe with just words.
But descriptive writing and drawing is something that I already enjoy doing. I feel I have to push myself a bit more. So I aim, after more research to find different ways in which I can approach my journal. I may find that these new techniques bring forth new ideas.

I have decided to write my journal in a book format. I am very traditional and I knew I would enjoy writing more than typing! I could also jot down any thoughts I had at any time. Great ideas always come to my mind when I am just letting my thoughts wander.... In fact a lot of my choreography is created from me sitting down, with or without my music and just looking unseeing out of a bus or train window, steps and movements flowing in my head. It is at these times that I could pull out the journal from my bag and start writing....I won't have to rely on my memory anymore!

I have a habit of scribbling things down when I'm in a rush or writing some sort of list in different note pads and on loose paper...I didn't want my journal to become another junk pad....or maybe, upon thinking about it, that's exactly what it needs to be? After all, from piles of junk you may find a precious treasure!